Tuesday, December 23, 2008

The Modern Favorites

Alright friends, last post until after the holidays. These are some of the funniest TV Christmas moments out there, from my favorite modern TV shows. We have Larry eating the baby Jesus on Curb Your Enthusiasm, two great yankee swap clips from The Office (American), and a Festivus miracle from Seinfeld. 'Tis the season to be Merry:








The Holidays of My Youth

As we push ahead in my own personal Holiday Recommends Week I am going to share with you the Christmas movies/TV shows of my younger years. These are highlights from the movies of the late 80's that I was obsessed with as a young little guy. I watched the CBS special Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer until the tape broke and don't think I have seen it since. Included below is the closing scene from the Ziggy Christmas Special, the Island of Misfit Toys introduction from Rudolph (stick with it until you see all the misfit toys, like the water gun that shoots jelly and the cowboy on an ostrich), and the classic dance sequence from Charlie Brown. They don't make them like this anymore, and if I ever have children I am going to be sure that they know it.






Monday, December 22, 2008

The Holiday Staples

A reminder from last week, I will be taking the week off from the normal list-recommenders approach to this blog. I don't know anyone who has to work at least on Thursday, and most people have off either Wednesday or Friday so I feel like it would be a throw away week anyway, and I'm never trying to rip anyone off. We'll resume in the normal format after New Years. For the rest of this week I am going to post some of my favorite holiday clips, if for nothing else but to make myself happy.

Today I decided to go with a few movies that I couldn't go without seeing during the holiday seasons of my youth. There are plenty more that I tried to watch every year, but here we have scenes from the movies that are must-see for me around the holidays.

Clip one is a musical number from A Muppet Christmas Carol. You may have to see this movie year after year to appreciate it...it's a little cheesy on it's own. If you don't want to watch the whole thing I advise fast forwarding to minute 3:43 to at least watch the Scrooge dance. He is finally overcome with Christmas joy and can't seem to contain himself from breaking into an arm-swaying dance. This is the stuff that dreams are made of:



I think everyone has seen A Christmas Story. This is one of my favorite scenes, although every scene from the movie qualifies as classic. Right after this Ralphie gets his mouth washed out with life boy. A Christmas survey: Was the person in line with Ralphie and Randy, who says "I like the Wizard of Oz, I like the Tin Man" a boy or a girl? I always thought a boy, but I'm not so sure anymore. It isn't in the clip below, but I'd really like to know the answer to this.



And finally a scene from National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation. This might be my holiday favorite Christmas movie. This scene isn't necessarily the best in the movie, but fast forward to 3:30. If anyone knows my brother Eric, they will know why every time I see this scene I think of him reacting to this situation in the very same way. Great, great, great:



Friday, December 19, 2008

FREE BOOKS!

My conclusion to the Jessica list may initially seem like a boring one, but the more I think about it the more excited I get. She recommended a bunch of websites to check out, one of which is http://bookthing.org/index.html. Pretty unexciting based on name alone right? But taken straight from their website the mission is this:
"Our mission is to put unwanted books into the hands of those who want them."
Also gathered from the FAQ section of the website--Yes the books really are really really free. They just have to be stamped when you leave that they are not for resale. Presumably all the books come to The Book Thing of Baltimore, Inc. through donation...they aren't overly specific about that but it seems implied. It occurs in Baltimore, MD. Yeah, Baltimore! The "City that reads" you still aren't, but this is a step in the right direction. Cal Ripken Jr. would be proud if he knew of this.

Go to the website for the address. Times they are open, as listed on the website are Saturday and Sunday 9a-6p. FREE BOOKS! There is still one full weekend left to check this out before Christmas...talk about a recession sale.

Christmas Recommends

I'm calling another audible for the Christmas season. I have one more day to post for Jessica, which will go up later this afternoon. It being the holiday season next week, I don't forsee myself doing a regular Wednesday and Thursday post. Nobody is going to be at work, and who reads blogs in their free time? So next week will be some holiday picks to warm the heart, straight from me to you. Thanks for the inflow of lists as well, after my recent cries for help. For good or bad, I'll be able to keep this going for many weeks to come. You guys are the best. This is for both of us:


Thursday, December 18, 2008

The Griffin and Sabine Trilogy--Nick Bantock


Since I haven't read this series of books, you can't really consider this a recommendation from me. I chose to write about it because after seeing it on JesKa's list I decided it was something that I want to buy and read based soley on the concept of the trilogy. I'm actually really excited to get ahold of them, and am much looking forward to reading the series. Good job, JeskA!

After researching this series of books by British author Nick Bantock, I found out that it is the first of two trilogy's he wrote based on the same concept. By most accounts I have read great reviews of The Griffin and Sabine Trilogy, and less than great accounts about the later Morning Star Trilogy. For this reason I am going to stick with the Griffin and Sabine Trilogy, unless I love it so much that I need more. What I learned from my favorite unreliable source Wikipedia is that the book is an epistolary novel, which means instead of a standard book format the story is told through a series of documents, in this case letters and postcards. The basic concept of a story told through letters is not new to me. My long-standing favorite book The Perks of Being a Wallflower by Steven Chbosky is written entirely as a series of letters by a boy of high school age. What I was impressed by is how much further Nick Bantock's trilogy takes this concept. The story of Griffin Moss, a postcard-making artist from London, and Sabine Strohem, a postage stamp artist from the South Pacific is told through a series of actual letters and postcards, instead of the book being written simply in a letter format. The collection of postcards and letters can be removed from the book and read as such, with some of the letters even coming in envelopes.

I have posted a couple of images of a few excerpts from the book, but I feel like the good time begins when you actually have the stuff in your hands. Most reviews of this I have read scream the trilogy's praise. I just hope that the story of Griffin and Sabine is as interesting as the concept. JeSka?





Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind--Michel Gondry

Before you look at the title of this post and decide you don't really have to read it, because you love Eternal Sunshine as many people do, be warned that I probably won't even address the movie in this post. I think it is awesome, and if you want to learn about it wikipedia has a very detailed entry here. It features an amazing cast of actors (Jim Carrey, Kate Winslet, Kirsten Dunst, Elijah Wood (so what if he's a weiner), David Cross, etc), and won a much-deserved Academy Award for Best Original Screenplay (which Charlie Kaufman contributed greatly to). It gets a full recommendation from me, and it being one of the only movies I own I stand strong behind it. As a whole the film really is a work of art, something not often achieved by a movie that was relatively commercially successful.

The mastermind behind Eternal Sunshine is director Michel Gondry, also known for his works Science of Sleep, Be Kind Rewind, and Human Behavior. What interests me most about the French director is his work outside of the feature-length film industry. Some of his best work comes in the form of short films, commercials, and a slew of music videos. I guarantee you've seen a LOT more of Gondry's work than you realize. My introduction to him outside of Eternal Sunshine came through this DVD called The Work of Director Michel Gondry (2003). It features many of his best music videos and a couple of really great commercials (I know, that is a weird thing to say) but they are worth checking out. In the music world he is most known for directing seven of Bjorks videos, in addition to David Chappelle's Block Party, and videos by the White Stripes, Beck, the Rolling Stones, Foo Fighters and Paul McCartney to name a few. Once again, Gondry makes real art in areas that don't always depend on such to be successful (music videos and commercials).

The best way to show his style, which is very original, is by example so I've included a few of my favorites. If you like them, it would be worth it to pick up the DVD mentioned above and go from there...it has a good representation of his work on it. I have included music videos of Beck's Cellphone's Dead, The White Stripes' Fell In Love (the lego stuff is awesome), and possibly his most well-known Bjork's Human Behavior (with the chasing bear). Also I've posted one example of his commercial work for Levis, but there are a ton more on youtube. Also, did anyone see the Science of Sleep? Was it worth a damn?









Tuesday, December 16, 2008

The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay--Michael Chabon

I should start with an apology for already falling behind this week. I was expecting this week to be another of commentary on Eric's list, but a firm kick from behind from a number of loyal readers urged me to push ahead. I guess this is for the better, because today I received an A+ list from funnyman Todd Hargest, and a promised list in the works from both thechristophermyers and Matthayes. So it looks like we'll be pushing ahead for at least another couple of months. I promise that even though I fell behind (this being a Tuesday post, and the first regarding Jessica's list) I will be sure to address four of her recommends. I might have to double up one day, or something unheard of like that. You have my word that it will happen though. The walrus will get its due. And now, onwards.

I have owned The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay (from this point forward referred to as AAKC) for at least three years now. It was actually recommended to me by Jessica in the earlier days of our knowing each other. I picked it up in one of those everything-is-clearance book stores in Ocean City, MD. I think I paid four dollars for it, which might be part of the reason I was never super motivated to read it. Have you ever noticed how paying less for something like a book or a CD seems to diminish its appeal? Like it isn't very good because it came so cheap. That might be how I felt about this. It is also a long read. It requires some commitment, and I was just never motivated to give it the time required to read it. A number of things caused me to pick it up and actually give it a try, one being my recent trip to Michigan, knowing that I would have a good amount of reading time. The other is that on goodreads every friend of mine who has read it (which is four total) gave it five starts (the maximum amount of stars!) I don't know that I personally would give it the full five stars, but I did enjoy it enough to make me happy that I read it.

AAKC is written by Michael Chabon. He also wrote the book Wonderboys, which in the late 90's was turned into a fairly popular movie that wasn't all that bad. Amazing Adventures won the Pulitzer Prize for Fiction in 2001. That's hot stuff. The story begins with Joe Kavalier, obviously one of the books main characters, escaping from Nazi-occupied Prague at the time of WWII. He manages to escape (he is a trained magician/escape artist, which ends up being a main theme of the novel) to New York City, where he stays with an aunt and cousin, Sam Klayman (the books other main character). Kavalier, a talented artist, and Clay a student of all comic books available team up to create The Escapist, which during the war years becomes one of the most successful comic books around. The majority of the book follows Kavalier's struggle to get the rest of his family out of Prague and into the United States, all the while dealing with the pain of having left them behind. There is much more to the book than this, but as stated before I'm not so good with words, and a summary or review would be better served if you got it elsewhere.

I will say that I was very impressed by how quickly this book read. I figured it would be one of those books that I would pick up every-so-often and would eventually finish some months after starting it. I ended up reading it in less than a week, and every spare minute I had I was trying to squeeze in a chapter. I tend to not devote a great deal of time to reading, so for me to finish a 650 page novel in less than a week, the book must have something going for it. It isn't a book that is jam-packed with action, but it does have some of those moments. You find yourself very attached to these characters, and even start to put yourself in their situation (which turns out pretty depressing in most cases). The book is extremely well-written, and it's receiving the number of awards that it did came as no suprise to me. It is a must read for anyone into comic books, which is a recurring theme in the book. If you aren't a comic book nut it is still well worth reading, but maybe not an immediate requirement (like I insist Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close from Week One is).

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Jessica Matthews (Hopkins?)


It only makes sense that the recommender to follow brother Eric be his so-called other half, new bride Jessica. I would give her a proper introduction but her list is lengthy. Also, she wouldn't want a wordy introduction because she is the person who constantly complains that these things are too long. She is great. I wanted to post the picture of her crying at her bridal shower, but I couldn't find it. I also almost posted this in lieu of a real picture of her at her request, but I decided against it. Her specialty is in the literature/writing area, but she has some real fine picks in all walks of recommends, right down to those Ricky B potatoes at the end. Also she has included some of her own commentary, and supplementary links to go along with this. Above and beyond the call of duty Jeska! Here we go:

Books:
Richard Brautigan--The Hawkline Monster: A Gothic Western
Richard Brautigan--Willard and His Bowling Trophies: A Perverse Mystery
Herman Hesse--Narcissus and Goldmund (I read the Hesse books a long time ago and couldn't tell you what they're about, but I remember really really liking them).
Herman Hesse--Steppenwolf
John Barth--The Floating Opera and The End of the Road (They're coupled together purposefully by the author.)
Mary Shelley--Frankenstein (I know it's a classic, but I feel like it's a classic that a lot of people haven't actually read. It's great, you should read it.)
Harper Lee--To Kill a Mockingbird (Another classic and maybe some of you were forced to read this in grade school, but I didn't read it until I was 25 and it blew my mind.)
Nick Bantok--The Griffin & Sabine Trilogy (It's just neat, you'll see.)
Neil Gaiman--The Sandman (graphic novel series)
Michael Chabon--The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier & Clay

Film:
Eyes Without a Face (1960)--not especially a fan of older films or horror films, but found myself really liking this
It Happened One Night (1934)--I caught this on Bravo several years ago and thought it was great, it also won lots of awards if you're into that sort of thing.
The Fisher King (a Terry Gilliam joint featuring Robin Williams and Jeff Bridges)--I loved this, however not everyone I know has felt the same way.
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
The Way of the Gun (I haven't found very many people who appreciate the smartness of the move the way I do)(editor's note: hmmm)
I Heart Huckabees--another movie that few people I know appreciate
It's A Wonderful Life
Childhood Favorites:
The Labyrinth
The Never-ending Story

TV:
My So-Called Life (it's sort of annoying to me now when I re-watch this as an adult, but this was the only network show that I identified with in my teens).
Arrested Development
The Office (American) -- though it's still too soon to commit myself to this as a whole series.
The Cosby Show

Music:
Serge Gainsbourg
Fleet Foxes
Beirut
Tom Waits (the early(ier) years)
Wilco/Jeff Tweedy
Granddaddy/Jason Lytle (specifically this video: http://www.stewdio.org/jed/ )
Elliott Smith

Places (actual or virtual):
http://www.sleeveface.com/
http://postsecret.blogspot.com/
http://bookthing.org/index.html
http://www.avam.org/
http://www.dimemuseum.com/ (R.I.P.)

Food:
Mutsu apples
Rick's mashed potatoes and bread pudding
My mom's hot German potato salad -- to which I cannot find an adequate recipe to link you to because it's different every time.


*all commentary is the work of the recommender, not the innocent blogger. You have a problem you take it up with her, I'll even send you her email address and two private cell phone numbers.

Friday, December 12, 2008

OK Fine

Due to a pretty underwhelming request, but a request none-the-less we will push ahead with our new recommendeer-er for next week. Check back this weekend for the JesKa list and we'll get started tearing it apart on Monday. In the mean time send those lists to hopkinak@gmail.com so we don't come up empty in three weeks.

Freaks and Geeks

I am calling an audible today, which would normally be the day for a fresh face, a new recommender. From fear of running out of these lists too soon, I have decided it necessary to extend brother Eric for one more week. This is my cry for help. I have three lists in the vault and need more to keep this string of mediocre blog-writing going. So, send those lists to hopkinak@gmail.com It might just make you famous. Luckily this list of Eric's is jam-packed with high quality recommends, so I'll have no problem stretching it for another week. Here we go.

Freaks and Geeks is a TV show that aired in 1999-2000, to much critical acclaim. Now, as we know from shows like Arrested Development, good TV shows just can't stay on the air. There is no place in this world for quality television, so after just 12 episodes Freaks and Geeks was axed. 18 episodes of the show were produced, all of which are available in this boxed set which is more than worth the $55 it costs. The show was created by Paul Feig and produced by Judd Apatow, who everyone everywhere has heard of for producing a load of recent comedies like Anchorman, 40-Year Old-Virgin, Knocked Up, Superbad, Walk Hard, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Pineapple Express, etc. Most of these films feature a core of actors who started working with Apatow in Freaks and Geeks. A really nice chart of this is available here.

Freaks and Geeks is like The Wonder Years set in the 80's. The central character Lindsay Weir (played by
Linda Cardellini) is finding her way in (I think) her senior year of high school, after quitting the Mathletes, joining a new group of friends (the Freaks), and dealing with her brother Sam and his friends (the Geeks). The fantastic character of the gym teacher is played by Thomas Wilson, who we all hopefully know and love as Biff from the Back to the Future trilogy. Once again, and in-depth plot synopsis isn't really necessary here, but if you loved the Wonder Years chances are this will be right up your alley (especially if you were in school in the 80's). Also, the series finale of Freaks and Geeks is one of my favorite last episodes of a TV show ever. Classic. The clips below are some of my favorites from the series, many focused on the character of Bill, who is easily the source of the shows funniest moments. The first clip sums up his character in about 10 seconds (he is the guy with glasses).










Thursday, December 11, 2008

Robert Rauschenberg

Robert Rauschenberg (b. 1925, and died very recently May 12, 2008) is a very interesting artist to me. He is someone who I had not checked out until big brother Eric recommended him via this blog. Ideally, that is what this blog is for, to turn people on to something they had never heard of or spent adequate time with prior to reading. This is one such occasion when it worked in favor of the author. I have only spent a day or two researching the life of this guy, but I am certainly intrigued to look further into his life and works.

I will rely heavily on my artist friends to chime in on this one, because surely they have spent time studying what Rauschenberg was about. I read a few bios and other write ups, in addition to some samples of the guys art and found a couple of things that were really interesting to me. A full bio is available here for those with interest beyond this extremely limited assessment. The essence of what he was about seems to be rooted in his distaste for the seriousness of the abstract expressionalist movement that was in its prime when Rauschenberg moved to New York in the early 1950's. Instead of adapting to this movement, he found his own way in the art world incorporating pop culture into his pieces. He is also well know for introducing found objects into the art-making process, which he referred to simply as combines. This technique seems to be a critical part to this day in the work of some friends, and favorite artists of my own. My personal interest in the artist was not sparked initially by viewing his art, but more by some of his personal quotes in reference to the art making process. I found the following quotes to be relevant to all areas of art-making, not just the visual arts. Some of my favorites:

"People ask me, 'Don't you ever run out of ideas?' In the first place I don't use ideas. Every time I have an idea it's too limiting, and usually turns out to be a disappointment. But I haven't run out of curiosity."

"Screwing things up is a virtue. Being correct is never the point. Being right can stop all the momentum of a very interesting idea.”

and the very uplifting..."I feel as though the world is a friendly boy walking along in the sun."
And some of his art that I found particulary stimulating:





Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Wes Anderson

It wouldn't be possible for me to describe in words my love for all of the Wes Anderson films. My favorite movie of all-time is the Royal Tenenbaums. I can say that without any hesitation, and it really requires no thought. At least one other (Rushmore) would make it into my top 5 movies of all-time, and the others wouldn't be too far behind (even my least favorite of them). I have a hard time even describing his work in words, because they are the perfect balance of (top-notch) acting, musical accompaniment, off-center dark humor, awkward heartbreaking dialogue, visual stimulation (the set design and costume design are detailed beyond description), etc, etc. It would be better for you to experience if for yourself that to read a mediocre description by me.

I would just watch them chronologically...it is really great to see Anderson's development from Bottle Rocket (1996) to Rushmore (1998) just two years later. In order they would go Bottle Rocket, Rushmore, Royal Tenenbaums (2001), The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou (2004), and The Darjeeling Limited (2007). My order of personal preference would be:

1) The Royal Tenenbaums
2) Rushmore
3) The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou
4) Bottle Rocket
5) The Darjeeling Limited (even though I still love it)
One of my favorite things about Wes Andersons films are the reappearance of certain actors in all of his films, the big guns being Bill Murray, Angelica Huston, Owen Wilson, Luke Wilson, and Kumar Pallana. Acting doesn't get much better than Bill Murray as Raleigh St. Clair or Herman Blume. Also of particular note are the great slowed down final scenes with perfect music playing that Wes Anderson is now known for. Here are three of my favorite clips from the films Eric specified--Rushmore, Royal Tenenbaums, and Life Aquatic. Can the boy tell time?









Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Pinkerton--Weezer


For me, Pinkerton (1996) is far and above the crowning achievement of Weezer's (now long) career. I'll be honest in saying that I haven't heard any of their albums after Maladroit (2002) and I was really really really not impressed by that one. For me their only album that could possibly rival the quality of Pinkerton is (other Eric recommends pick) Weezer (The Blue Album). Even that album, as great as it is, is really no comparison. I know a lot of people are aware of Pinkerton making me hesitant to post about it, but in the process of researching this post I discovered some really interesting things about the album that I was inclined to share. The major difference between Pinkerton and any other Weezer album is the rawness of the sound. The overall sound of the album is significantly darker than the rest of their output (that I am aware of) and it lacks their poppy side which was so crucial in hits like Buddy Holly and The Sweater Song. There isn't a band song on the 10-track record, and as I've talked about before in other favorite albums (see Bjork's Vespertine) the album as a whole has a sound. It isn't just about quality on a song-to-song basis, part of the beauty of this album is how well every song contributes to the album as a whole.

Some interesting facts about Pinkerton that I wasn't aware of (thanks Wikipedia!). The original album concept was to write a space-themed opera entitled Songs From the Black Hole, a seamless album in which all the songs were supposed to flow into one another. A detailed and pretty interesting summary of this concept is available right here, but as always with Wikipedia reader beware. Still, the failed concept and how it morphed into Pinkerton is pretty interesting, even though I didn't read the whole thing. The album did, however, end up being loosely based around the Puccini opera Madame Butterfly, with the album name coming from a character in the opera.

Another interesting Weezer fact that I feel like I should have been aware of is that Rivers Cuomo attended Harvard beginning in 1995, and started immediately after the initial songs (Why Bother?, Getchoo, Tired of Sex, No Other One) for Pinkerton were recorded. The remainder of the album was recorded over the course of the next year while Cuomo was on break from classes at Harvard. All songs on the album are written by Cuomo, and all seem to be about or directly affected by events in his personal life.

Initially Pinkerton was a major commercial failure, especially being the first album they recorded after the hugely successful Blue Album. However as time goes on, this album seems to make its way onto more and more peoples' favorite albums list. So many musician (and non-musician) friends of mine, including those who listen to relatively little rock music, site this as being one of their favorite rock albums. On the other end of that a lot of people hate Pinkerton for it's underproduced and pop-lacking sound. These people are not my kind of people. Pinkerton rules, simply put. The one time I saw Weezer live, at least two or three years after the release of Pinkerton, they played almost the entire album with only a few tracks from (the then new) Green Album, and a couple choice Blue Album songs. I was thrilled.

A few samples of the album, via youtube. I didn't even know their was a video for El Scorcho, one of my favorite tracks from Pinkerton. Also included is the music video for The Good Life, and a nice (though much rockier, and much less acoustic) live recording of the album's final track Butterfly:






Monday, December 8, 2008

Curb Your Enthusiasm

Larry David is the funniest man alive. There is really no question about this, and there is no argument that could be made to make me think otherwise. He may be the funniest man who has ever lived, but one could maybe make a case against that. Regardless, he is without question the funniest man around today, and Curb Your Enthusiasm is the peak of his comedic genius. Now, this is coming from a Seinfeld fan.

For those who don't know, Jerry Seinfeld and Larry David are the co-cre
ators of Seinfeld. The character of George Costanza (played by Jason Alexander) is based on the real life Larry David. Curb Your Enthusiasm is an HBO television series completely based on the life of Larry David, written by Larry David, and even better than having Jason Alexander play the part of Larry he plays it himself. Everyone who claims to be a Seinfeld fan needs to see Curb Your Enthusiasm, there is no question about that.

There are a number of reasons I think Curb is better than Seinfeld, probably the biggest and most obvious is that Seinfeld was written for (and therefore subject to editing by) Network television. Curb is written for HBO, where almost anything goes and Larry David (seemingly) has free reign to do anything he wants on the show. The other major difference is that even though not really an actor, Larry David is funnier than anyone on the cast of Seinfeld. The acting overall on Curb feels more natural than Seinfeld, likely due to the fact that there is no script. A scene for Curb is designed in detail in advance, but the script is improvised by the actors. No one has set lines, giving it a much more real life and natural feel.

I love every season of this show, but for me some stand as being better than others. If you have never seen any of Curb, I advise you start with Season One and go through the whole series (Season Six concluded this year). You get a really good impression of what the show is about in the first couple episodes of the first season. The one exception to this is if I have a friend who has never seen a single episode of the show I always show them the Season Finale to Season Three (which Curb fans will know as the restaurant opening with the tourretic chef). This is my favorite episode of the series, and if a person doesn't like it then they probably won't like any of the show. Also, each season has a continuous plot-line within where each episode builds on the previous so you would get more out of watching the seasons in order. Now, the worst seasons of Curb are still far better than anything else on TV today. That being said my ranking of the seasons is as follows, favorite to least favorite:

Season Three (The Restaurant)
Season Six (The Blacks)
Season One (No real season story--more individual episodes)
Season Four (The Producers)
Season Two (TV projects with Jason Alexander and Juilia Louis-Dreyfus)
Season Five (Richard Lewis' Kidney)
It is really promising that the show has no signs of diminishing quality, with the most recent season being my second favorite. Even Season Five, which is most least favorite season overall, has some of my favorite episodes individually. Below are a few clips of the show below, by no means the best (I am trying to keep it relatively clean) but hopefully they give you an idea for the premise. Warning: Some clips may contain inappropriate material:




Friday, December 5, 2008

Eric Michael Hopkins


Talk about friends...look at these guys, having fun on the beach. Brother Eric is two years my elder. And what a guy. Artist/musician/owner-of-great-dog/husband-to-great-wife/brother-to-amazing-brother kind of guy. Most people who know me know him as well, and realize that he got all the muscle and height that my parents have to give (leaving none for me), but a charming, slight, nearly constant grumpiness as well. His primary field of interest is visual art, and he makes some amazing stuff (paintings, drawings) when he is motivated to do so. If I ever get ahold of them I'll be sure to post some of his work from an art show with m. bovie from last year. He also hit four, correction six homeruns for our softball team this year. Whoa! (He insisted I change that).

A recommends list from him reads an awful lot like one from myself would, with the exception of the music section, although all these picks are great. I would say about 75% percent of the things here would make its way onto my very own recommends list, which essentially means I will probably never have to do one. And without further ado, Eric recommends:

Music:


Radiohead--OK Computer, Kid A
The Beatles--Abbey Road
Neutral Milk Hotel--In the Aeroplane Over the Sea
Weezer--Blue Album, Pinkerton
Pavement--Crooked Rain, Crooked Rain, Brighten the Corners, Slanted and Enchanted

Television:


Seinfeld Season 9, especially "The Burning" episode
The Adventures of Pete and Pete
Freaks and Geeks
Arrested Development
The Office (American)
Curb Your Enthusiasm

Movies:

Anything Wes Anderson (top three, Rushmore, The Royal Tennenbaums, The Life Aquatic)
Edward Scissorhands
Paul Thomas Anderson (Punch Drunk Love, Magnolia)
The Big Lebowski
Christopher Guest (This is Spinal Tap, Best in Show)

Books:


Vonnegut--Bluebeard
David Eggers--A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius

Art:

Marcel Dzama
Henry Darger
Mark Rothko
m. bovie
Robert Rauschenberg
Souther Salazar

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Arrested Development

The Arrested Development count is currently at 1. Keep that in mind, you'll be hearing a lot more about this one from various recommenders. Today is not a very blog friendly day for me, so I apologize to all of those looking for a wordy and typically unfocused post.

I haven't seen all of Arrested Development. I have watched some really great episodes that I would put right up there with some of the best television, but I still need to see the whole series. It's on the list of things to do. So for this one I relied on my family Arrested Development expert, brother Eric, to suggest one of his favorite clips from the show for your viewing pleasure. Curve ball, it's on Hulu not Youtube!


Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Slaughterhouse-Five--Kurt Vonnegut

Of all of Vonnegut's novels I would have to guess that Slaughterhouse-Five is his most well-known and frequently-read. And with good reason, because it is a fantastic book and one of my all time favorites. Really cool high schools have it in their curriculum for required reading and really lame high schools have banned it. And so it goes...

I am not much of a literary critic, or a literary critic at all come to think of it, so a review of the book would be better read elsewhere. A plot summery, too. All of that stuff is over at wikipedia, but if you are interested enough to read about the plot you should just read the whole book. It is quick and super amazing. I think a lot of people go through a Vonnegut stage when they first discover his writing. I did, and read 6 or 7 of his books in a row because I loved his writing style. Prior to reading his books it was uncommon for me to laugh aloud (lol!) when reading a book. So below I have decided to rank my favorite Vonnegut books in the simple fashion of one being my favorite, and taking it from there:

1) Bluebeard (1987)--slightly lesser known, but so great. Among my top five favorite books ever. Stay tuned next week for brother Eric to recommend this one as well.
2) Slaughterhouse-Five (1969)--straight from the mouth of Cory Palmer, you should read this.
3) Cat's Cradle (1963)--first one I read. On the sci-fi side of things, but got me interested to read more.
4) Hocus Pocus (1990)
5) Deadeye Dick (1982)
6) Breakfast of Champions (1973)--this one came highly recommended from a bunch of people, so my hopes were high. Compared to his other works I wasn't that impressed. I think I should see the movie.

All of these books are worth reading, but Bluebeard and Slaughterhouse-Five are really must read books if you like funny and great things. Sidenote--I have never read it so I can't comment, but our first recommender TJ Huff had Welcome to the Monkeyhouse (short stories) on his list, so that is also probably worth a damn.

Special treat! In Vonnegut's own book Psalm Sunday (1981) the author ranks his works up to that point in time. I have put them in order from highest to lowest ranking. A recommends straight from the author:

Cat's Cradle--A plus
Slaughterhouse-Five--A plus
The Sirens of Titan--A
Mother Night--A
God Bless You, Mr. Rosewater--A
Jailbird--A
Player Piano--B
Welcome to the Monkeyhouse--B minus
Breakfast of Champions--C
Psalm Sunday--C
Slapstick--D

And a quote (of apology) from within Slaughterhouse-Five to Vonnegut's publisher Sam Lawrence:
And I say to Sam now: 'Sam-here's the book.' It's so short and jumbled and jangled, Sam, because there is nothing intelligent to say about a massacre. Everybody is supposed to be dead, to never say anything or want anything ever again. Everything is supposed to be very quiet after a massacre, and it always is, except for the birds. And what do the birds say? All there is to say about a massacre, things like 'Poo-tee-weet?

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

The Earth Is Not a Cold Dead Place--Explosions In the Sky

If you are into instrumental rock bands like Mogwai and Godspeed You! Black Emperor you don't need to read the rest of this, you just need to go get ahold of some Explosions In the Sky albums. I like a lot of bands in the instrumental rock vein (often called "post-rock," which I've always thought a stupid name for a genre of music) but Explosions In the Sky is actually my favorite. Prevas turned me on to Explosions a bunch of years ago after he saw them play at some rug store somewhere near Baltimore. He told me to buy an album and I bought "Those Who Tell the Truth Shall Die, Those Who Tell the Truth Shall Live Forever" (2001) which is an excellent introduction, but warned me that the live show is the best way to experience the band. A few years went by and I continued to listen to the album (and love it) intermittently and then Explosions came to a crappy bar in Michigan when I was there for grad school. I got Cory to go with me, and Prevas was right. This band is amazing live. Don't get me wrong, you should definitely get their albums and I consider the one that Cory recommends to be their best, but if you ever get a chance to see them live you need to do it. It was enough to get this band on an all-time recommends list for CP.

You may have heard Explosions without knowing it. The instrumental element of the band really lends itself to accompany film, and their music by itself is often described as cinematic. They wrote and performed the score for the movie Friday Night Lights with Billy Bob Thorton, and "The Only Moment We Were Alone" from "The Earth Is Not a Cold Dead Place" is playing in a trailor for the new film "Australia." You can see a pretty comprehensive list of their music being used in film and television in their wikipedia entry. Their songs tend to be long, usually around the 10 minute mark, and often use minimalist composition techniques to allow the music to move and grow slowly. It is great music for a late night drive in the middle of nowhere. Below are two clips, the first being a live performance of "First Breath After Coma" from the album this entry is recommending, and the second the aforementioned trailer for Australia which features the music of Explosions In the Sky (up until the planes start dropping bombs, then it isn't them anymore).





Sunday, November 30, 2008

The Office (Original British Version)

And we're up and running again after a very extended holiday weekend. We're getting right down to business (I'm trying to embrace brevity) with a few more Cory Palmer picks before we proceed to our first flesh-and-blood recommends.

Everyone has probably seen one of the versions of the Office. The American version is all over television here in, well, America. It is a never-miss for me on Thursday nights (actually I usually miss it, but I always catch it after the fact before next weeks episode...it is free on NBC.com. That counts). I feel like less people have seen it's British predecessor (with brevity comes slightly bigger words as well). I saw the entire British series, which is two full seasons, before I had ever really heard of the American Office. The first season of the American Office is basically a remake of the first season of the British Office, and then they went their own way with it. All of the characters are in both versions, but with different names and drastically different personalities. This wikipedia entry has some additional info including the character equalities, the biggest being the boss David Brent played by Ricky Gervais in the British Office, and Michael Scott played by Steve Carell in the American Office. Also, the humor in the British version is a little more, well, British.

When I heard about the American Office I immediately said that it could ever equal the quality of it's British counterpart without even seeing an episode, because I loved the British version so much. It is a fairly regular argument among some friends about which is the superior version, but it's really apple and oranges. Basically, if you currently enjoy the American Office and haven't seen the British version you probably should because it is equally as funny. Same goes the other way around. Like I said, I love both and don't think I could choose between the two. Cory favors the British version, so here are two of my favorite clips from the series.




Thursday, November 27, 2008

Happy Thanksgiving, friendly world.

In lieu of the holiday I decided not to post a formal entry today, which further rips Cory's picks off (he only got two days this week). So, since most people are off work tomorrow anyway, and shopping, and not reading awesome blogs I won't post then either. We'll pick back up on Monday and I'll continue with Cory's recommends. New list next Friday from brother Eric.

Hopefully everyone has things to be thankful for, and I hope you spent the day doing something you enjoy. I came across this great clip of my favorite comedian Andy Kaufman, and it just seemed right to share with you all.


Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Bjork--Vespertine vs. Medulla

Vespertine (2001) and Medulla (2004) are two successive releases from Iclandic singer Bjork. Now, upon receiving vicious criticism from loyal readers I am trying to shorten the length of these posts (I tend to ramble on?), and this is my first attempt. Let's get down to business.

I hated Bjork before I heard Vespertine. I thought she was a weirdo and I could never understand her music (after hearing parts of albums Post and Homogenic). Hearing Vespertine changed all of it for me. The soundscapes she creates on the album are amazing...sampling everyday things like door slams, popcorn sounds, ice cracking, someone walking on snow, and cards shuffling to create really interesting beats. The overall sound of Vespertine is heavily sampled giving it an electronic feel, but it is more organic because of the constant use of everyday sounds.

Medulla on the other hand is almost completely a vocal album. Sampling (of vocals) is still a major part of the project, but almost every sound on the album originates from the human voice (with very few exceptions). She enlists the help of heavyweight voice noisemakers Mike Patton (of Faith No More, Mr. Bungle, Fantomas) and Rahzel (the Roots, and possibly the greatest beatboxer of all time) on a couple of tracks.

For me Vespertine is the masterpiece of Bjork's career. It is a complete musical statement and the album itself has a sound. Every song on it has it's own vibe, but they all contribute to the complete album sound. It is also forward thinking and innovative while still remaining true to the album concept. Medulla on the other hand is very much an experimental album. It is amazing that Bjork was able to put together such an interesting album with only the use of vocals, but for me it always sounds a little like something is missing. I still LOVE the album, but it doesn't quite work overall to me as well as Vespertine does. For the record I prefer Vespertine but Cory noted in his post that he prefers Medulla. You be the judge for yourself! Below are three interesting quotes by Bjork about the album sound and vibe of Vespertine, followed by a video for each--Hidden Place from Vespertine (first) and Where Is the Line? from Medulla (second).

"It sounds like a winter record. If you wake up in the middle of the night, and you go out in the garden, everything's going on out there that you wouldn't know about. That's the mood I'm trying to get. Snow owls represent that very well."

"I was collecting together all the noises that I know that are like hibernating and that sound like the inside of your head. I guess 'Vespertine' for me was going really, really, really internal and trying to make music with huffs and whispering and music boxes."

"Vespertine is little insects rising from the ashes."







Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Almost Famous (2000)--Cameron Crowe

This entry could be alternately titled "I Already Dropped the Ball" and it could be an apology to my many, many loyal readers. The intent of Friends Recommend is for daily updates and feedback on some of my friends' favorite things. And a little over one week into this and I've already missed an entry. I swear my reason is valid, and has something to do with me being in Michigan all weekend in sub-zero temperatures, but who wants to hear about that?

A little further into this entry we'll address the fantastic movie Almost Famous, but I can already see that I'm going to run out of days this week to cover all of the Cory picks that I stand behind whole-hearted. So I'm just going to give some backup and props to a few of these picks that I might not get to. Hopefully I'll get to cover some of them in the next few days, but if not these are a few of my all-time favorite things that made it to Cory's list and I feel everyone would/could enjoy. They are the Bartok String Quartets, Bjork's Vespertine (sorry, no love for you Medulla!), Slaughterhouse Five (Vonnegut's Bluebeard nudges this one out for me, but I still love this book), Amelie, Donny Darko, and the British Office (although I think I am won over as a Michael Scott fan). All of these things are worthy of your ears and eyes and if I don't give them adequate recognition this week, I hope to in the future.

When I look over these lists of my friends, I generally try to comment on the things that I have some knowledge of that might be slightly lesser known to this audience as a whole. For instance Cory's list initially had the Harry Potter books on it, which I know he loves. However I decided to remove them (with his approval!) because most people have already formed an opinion, and if they were going to read them they have probably already done so. I've already made the decision that I will probably never read these books, so a recommendation doesn't weigh too heavy with me. I also try to apply this point of view to the things from a list that I choose to comment on during the week. Today's commentary does not follow this point of view. I know most people have seen Almost Famous, and most people I know already love it. But when I was going through Cory's list I found a Youtube clip of the scene that ends this post and I couldn't resist getting it up here. It has contributed strongly to my strange and unhealthy love of this song.

If you have never seen Almost Famous, I am recommending that you go out and get a copy now or put it at the top of your Netflix cue. If you don't like it you can blame me, but if you don't like it we probably don't have all that much reason to be friends anyway. If you fall into this category and you rent it based soley on my recommendation and really dislike it, please comment and tell me why. I need to know.

The basic story line is of an aspiring teenage rock journalist, William Miller, and his pursuit of writing a cover story for Rolling Stone on the fictional band Stillwater. Philip Seymour Hoffman is his usual amazing self in the role of Lester Bangs, and Kate Hudson and Jason Lee are both standout in their roles of Penny Lane and Jeff Bebe. All-time favorite funnyman Mitch Hedberg also makes an appearance as the Eagles road manager. This is one of my favorite scenes from the film and if you tell me you weren't singing along by the end I would probably call you a liar. The scene is a testament to the powers of Elton John's Tiny Dancer.


Friday, November 21, 2008

Cory Palmer


This seems like the right day to put up a Cory recommends list, because as I type this I am sitting in the Detroit Metro Airport waiting for him to come pick me up in his big red minivan. Cory was one my seven roomates in what was dubbed the "basshouse" in Michigan, cleverly given it's title because five of the seven people living there were bassists. Deep, I know. I Iook forward to spending the weekend with him drinking some much missed Michigan beers. He also promised me that he wears pajamas now, so there won't be too many awkward Cory-in-his-boxers moments that many of us have grown to love. Anyway, Cory is an extremely talented orchestral bassist currently living in New York attending the Manhatten School of Music and is plugging away on the orchestral audition circuit. He will be a student until he wins an audition, and Manhatten is college number 3. Good luck, guy!

Cory has a real nice, huge (I actually had to edit some of it for size out of consideration for our less focused (sister-in-law) readers) recommend post. And for the record this is the last list I have in the vaults, so for this to continue some friends need to start recommending! Don't be timid. No one is judging your picks, just happily accepting your recommendations. I promise. Email them to hopkinak@gmail.com And without further ado, Cory recommends:

Music:

Bjork--Medulla, Vespertine
Bob Dylan--The Freewheelin' Bob Dylan
Explosions in the Sky--The Earth is Not a Cold Dead Place
The Roots--Things Fall Apart
K-OS--Atlantis
Sage Francis--Personal Journals
Killswitch Engage--Alive or Just Breathing
Krakatoa--Channel Static Blackout
Cleveland Orchestra conducted by George Szell
The Julliard Quartet--Bartok String Quartets
Pablo Casals--Bach Cello Suites
Rostropovich--Shostakovich Cello Concerto

Books:

Vladimir Nabakov--Lolita
Irvine Welsh--Trainspotting
Vonnegut--Slaughterhouse Five
Douglas Hofstadter--Metamagical Themas
Ayn Rand--Atlas Shrugged
Fyodor Dostoevsky--Crime and Punishment

Film:

Amelie
Donnie Darko
Almost Famous
Man On Fire
Equilibrium
Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels

Art:

Dali
M.C. Escher

Miscellaneous:

Television:
Arrested Development
Entourage
The Office (British version)
Heroes (1st Season)

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Cheap At Half the Price--Fred Frith

Fred Frith is a musician, composer, improviser, guitarist and more most commonly associated with the avant-garde side of jazz and improvised music. He is a musician that I haven't spent very much time familiarizing myself with, but one who I have always known I would enjoy and need to start listening to. I link to wikipedia a lot, but they have a pretty comprehensive description of him here if you are interested in learning more about the guy. Some of his work that I have checked out (not too in depth) and enjoyed is the band Skeleton Crew with Tom Cora, a duo album with Anthony Braxton, and some recordings with John Zorn. If you are looking for more stuff to check out perhaps Huff will chime in here and point you in the right direction.

The album we have today, and our last post from the TJ Huff list (our inaugural friends recommend list!) is Fred Frith's Cheap At Half the Price. TJ has been getting on me for a long time to listen to this one, even going as far as sneaking it on my ipod some months ago. It had been sitting there untouched until last week when I got TJ's recommend list and I figured it was probably time to give it a chance. I must admit, I am completely in love with this album now. It is eclectic beyond description with influences drawn from anywhere and everywhere. It is (supposedly) the first album Fred Frith sings on, which he does on about half the tracks, the other half of the album being instrumental. I would never call this a "pop" album but it is definitely pop-influenced (whatever that means) and much much more accessible that I expected from the first Fred Frith album I really checked out. If you consider yourself drawn to singers with weird and unconventional voices this is something for you. At first listen it reminded me of a mix between They Might Be Giants, Devo, and Servotron, but edgier and more interesting. A documentary about Frith titled Step Across the Border was released in 1990 and I definitely intend to check it out to learn more.

I wish I could post the whole album here so you could listen to how different each track is, but I can't. You can't even upload audio by itself to this site so I've set one of the tracks from Cheap At Half the Price to a couple of pictures of Frith in imovie. Don't mind the pictures...I just put them there so the screen wouldn't be black the whole time. This track is from the vocal half of the album and is called "The Welcome". It was very hard to choose just one, but I think this captures the mood and charm of what he does through the whole album and makes you feel happy in an off-center kind of way. Really, if you like slightly strange music you should have this album.




That might have been too short. Here is one more track off the album to give you more of an idea. Sorry, no pictures with this one just the audio. This is "Cap the Knife". I also really love "Some Clouds Don't," and "Some Clouds Do" and also how the track "Absent Friends" sounds like Riverdance meets the Shire. Enjoy!


Wednesday, November 19, 2008

The Big Snit (1985)--Richard Condie



This is a short ten-minute animation by Canadian film-maker Richard Condie. I'll be honest and say that I really wasn't a fan of this after my initial viewing, but this second time it really started to grow on me. Huff really loves this one. The short exchanges between the husband and wife are my favorite parts, and I really love when he says he isn't sawing. Pretty good. This will only take up ten minutes of your day, so take a look. More info on Richard Condie at his website.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Cello Concerto--Aram Khachaturian

I am pretty sure every single one of my readers is familiar with the work of Soviet-Armenian composer Aram Khachaturian. I would actually bet money on this. If you think you are not familiar with his work stop reading this post now and call me on the phone and bet me some money on this. A lot of money, I would put it up. The reason I am so confident in this is because if you have ever been to the circus and seen dogs jumping through hoops, or a person spinning plates on TV, or a guy on a unicycle Khachaturian's Sabre Dance has probably been playing in the background. It has also been used in the Simpsons, and is the theme music for the Buffalo Sabres hockey team. If you are still unsure how Sabre Dance goes here is a youtube clip:



Now if you recognize this and are a friend of mine, chances are you have experienced my favorite pop culture reference to Sabre Dance. Remember Pee-Wee's Big Adventure? Remember that amazing scene of Pee-Wee making his breakfast and then pouring Mr. T cereal all over his waffles? OK, so the music playing isn't Sabre Dance. It is Breakfast Machine by Danny Elfman (who scores all of Tim Burton's films), but check out the scene below and pay attention to the music (it also plays throughout the rest of the movie). There is no way that Sabre Dance wasn't the direct influence for the mood and character of Breakfast Machine. See for yourself:



So there is your introduction to the great composer Aram Khachaturian. Although Sabre Dance is his most well-known work I would definitely not consider it his finest. I haven't actually heard the Cello Concerto recommended by Huff in it's entirety, just this clip of a child-prodigy playing one movement of it on Youtube (sorry for all the youtube today).



The clip did interest me enough to download the whole three-movement work when my downloads refresh on emusic.com. If you are looking to expand your classical horizons you could do worse than to start with the work of Khachaturian. The larger-scale orchestral works might be a good place to begin. The Suite from Spartacus is another very popular work which has been featured in a number of movies. Additionally, Sabre Dance is just one small part of the ballet Gayane, and although I have beaten the Youtube clips into the ground today one more example of Khachaturian's work, also from Gayane, is this classic scene from Stanley Kubrick's 2001: A Space Odyssy:



Additionally since the whole basis of this blog is recommendations and since I already mentioned Danny Elfman in this post, I would urge you to check him out as well. My personal favorite is the score to Edward Scissorhands, but there are plenty of others out there as well (the original Batman, Nightmare Before Christmas, and Big Fish all come to mind immediately).

Monday, November 17, 2008

Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close--Jonathon Safron Foer

Not only does our most recent poster TJ Huff recommend this book, but I also strongly urge you to read it. If I were to submit one of these silly lists this would be in the top-5 of my must read picks. After a year or two of TJ telling me I had to read Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close I finally broke down and bought it used off Amazon.com for $4.00. You can currently get it there at the amazingly low price of $3.05. Crazy!

It usually takes me a long time to read a book...like months. This isn't because I am stupid (it may be partially because I am stupid) or a slow reader. It just tends to take me a while to get involved in a book, and I end up reading most of them a few pages at a time over the course of a couple of months. This, however, is one of those books that as soon as I picked up I couldn't stop reading and ended up finishing it in two days. If you want a nice big-word explanation of the book you can check this summary out over at Wikipedia.

Basically it is the story of a boy named Oskar (I think he is 12, he might be 9, but I think 12, but maybe 9 now that I really think about it) dealing with the loss of his father who was killed in the Septemeber 11 attacks. He goes on a city-wide search (in NYC) looking for the owner of a key he found in his father's room. Now, the book has its share of very saddening moments as could be expected. As Oskar would say some of it makes you "wear heavy boots." But what I loved most about the book is how these sad parts are paired with funny...really funny, like some of the funniest things I have read in a book, like LOL funny, parts. The overall effect of this is what TJ calls happy-sad, or beautiful-sad...I'm sure everyone can think of an example of a happy-sad thing they love. Happy-sad is sort of the same as salty-sweet, which is why things like chocolate-covered pretzels are so good. It is also why life-long friend (and weirdo) Matthayes dips his french fries in his frosty when eating at Wendy's. A lot of songs are happy-sad, one of my favorites being Martha by Tom Waits, which you can check out here. Sad because what he's talking about is so depressing, but happy because the song is just so good. Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close is this same kind of thing. I urge fellow Friends Recommend readers to leave their favorite happy-sad things in comment form. I'm dying to know! I'll leave you with this excerpt from the second page of Extremely Loud:

My first jujitsu class was three and a half months ago. Self-defense was something that I was extremely curious about, for obvious reasons, and Mom thought it would be good for me to have a physical activity besides tambourining, so my first jujitsu class was three and a half months ago. There were fourteen kids in the class, and we all had on neat white robes. We practiced bowing, and then we were all sitting down Native American style, and then Sensei Mark asked me to go over to him. "Kick my privates," he told me. That made me feel self-conscious. "Excusez-moi?" I told him. He spread his legs and told me, "I want you to kick my privates as hard as you can." He put his hands at his sides, and took a breath in, and closed his eyes, and that's how I knew that he actually meant business. "Jose," I told him, and inside I was thinking, What the? He told me, "Go on, guy. Destroy my privates." "Destroy your privates?" With his eyes still closed he cracked up a lot and said, "You couldn't destroy my privates if you tried. That's what's going on here. This is a demonstration of the well-trained body's ability to absorb a direct blow. Now destroy my privates." I told him, "I'm a pacifist," and since most people my age don't know what that means, I turned around and told the others, "I don't think it's right to destroy people's privates. Ever." Sensei Mark said, "Can I ask you something?" I turned back around and told him "'Can I ask you something?' is asking me something." He said, "Do you have dreams of becoming a jujitsu master?" "No," I told him, even thought I don't have dreams of running the family jewelry business anymore. He said "Do you want to know how a jujitsu student becomes a jujitsu master?" "I want to know everything," I told him, but that isn't true anymore either. He told me "A jujitsu student becomes a jujitsu master by destroying his master's privates." I told him, "That's fascinating." My last jujitsu class was three and a half months ago.